Not Anymore

Not Anymore

My baby
has been passed on
two months now,
and, I think,
it’s only been
in the last few days
that it has really began
to sink in.
She’s not coming back
anymore.

I’ll never again look up
from the computer
to see her grin hello
as she walks in the door.
We’ll never again
have long talks
at the table
over hot coffee and tea,
no, not anymore.
Never again
to hear the smile
in her voice.
Never again
to feel the gentle touch
of her hand.
Never again will
we be outside and notice
the full moon up there
in the sky at night.
No, never again.
Not anymore.

No more errands
together joking
and laughing at
the signs as we
drive across town.
No more
of all the small things
that she always did
to brighten my day.
No more cuddles
in the afternoon,
and again
late at night.
No more kisses
No more I love you’s
lilting like the notes
of a song from her lips.
Never again.
Not from Laino,
no, not anymore.

Her soul
has been to visit often
of this I’m sure,
but I am greedy
for her touch
not only in eternity
beyond the blue veil,
but here in this world too.
And here, alone at the table
I take a drag on my cigarette
and reach for her deep
in my heart,
only to find
a gaping hole there.
She’s not coming back.
No, not anymore.

Dewey Dirks

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2 comments on “Not Anymore

  1. Dahmey says:

    Amazing

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